El Chapo

The minion is an antidepreesnt pill, which was given life (sadly) by satin himself, and became the "loving' minion that we know today, a walking around cancer., frequently used by Orlie when he was going through werid flashbacks of the great weeaboo war, in which he said it was from another dimmension, and that three great heroes, represnting him and his fture friends, would one day save the war from destruction. The minion (mionioncytozine 20 mg) pill was made from the likes of Dr. Sac and leader in the world of anti depressents. The mioni proved better for most people. repacing their sadness with vientam flashbacks, which distraete d them away from the feelings of hopelessness. However, in a failed lab expermient, in which Balck donated his blood to antidepressent research, the mionion antidepressent pill beccame what we know as the fucking ugly ass yellow mionion from despicable me that haunts you in your sleep. This failed experiment caused a near existential crisis to many, as they would walk around the neighborhood being greeted by large yellow blobs of cancer, coming from blacks decent. Even god himself was dissapointed in the minion that he abandoned humanity completey, resulty in the rise of edy 16 year old kids thinking that ahtiesm is some sort of philosophy. Howeber, the minion soon rose, and slowly took over CHina, in which the chinese thought they were the same because they were yellow and had glasses. Since mionsions were living cancer tumors, they would split unconditionally as the two split mionions would cry eternally as they were being ripped apart slowy to become new cancers. The splitting minions usually knew they were sins to society, and that they should be exterminated, but every time they tried to end their suddering, they would split again, only to create more deprsessed versions of themsleves, creating a neverending cycle of pain and hoplessness. This pain hurt themso much that they started to get high to the pain, in which their natural antidepressent parts would overload them so much they didn't know what was reality. This resulted in mionions to smile endlessly only to look up into the sky as the antidepressents made them htink that they saw god and to this today they continuing looking u in hopes of being saved by god, in hoeps od ending it all. Soon minions could only do labor work to heal their pain, as doing work made themsleves fell like contributing to society, even though it made production worse. In order to feel more human, the minions have killed and replaced everyone in China and Bangladesh as their own kind, working endlesly to feel mroe human, and ultimately heal their pain. But that never happened. And to this dya, they are still making nikes in China, in hopes of being recognzied as human.